one time i dreamed that wilmer valderrama pooped in the hallway of a hotel and they scooped it up, covered it in gold, framed it, and gave it it’s own room for tourists to view it
last night i dreamed i was best friends with George Bush and he called me his BFF and we were hugging on playground
and then i went back to the white house and his family were all crying muppets
i also dreamt that my friend justin was driving people around toronto…
and jesus looked like the blonde beegee and was in a milkshake business. he sold them in vending machines, and was climbing an apartment building
then justin got into an accident and hit jesus with the car while jesus was scaling the building
i had a dream today that ewan mcgregor and pierce brosnan were a gay couple and they were having an argument
pierce brosnan yelled “you think you have balls? you have a log but where’s the basket?!!!!!!!!!!!!”
i have this idea now that i should make a book about my dreams.
on the left have a drawing or painting of a scene from it
and then on the other page a little write up.
my dreams are waaaaaaaaaay too fucked up not to share i mean really cmon now
The futuristic New York bachelorette party dream.
I went to costco to buy candy, and some pills you can sell for 10 dollars each as a drug dealer were there. i bought a bag but gave to my mom out of fear to buy. she did. Next day was my bachelorette party. i spent the night with her when all my friends left without me. she had old shrimp pasta from a few weeks ago in the fridge. i threw it out. she bought me a gigantic vodka bottle yet asked me if i was drunk that night and i said no and she said good. i was a supermodel in FUTURISTIC new york with red head taylor swift, and 3 other women. we went to a sheridan event, where you take off your shirt when someone tags you. i was wearing a dress. so i didnt wanna take it off, but my friend told me to unbutton it so i did. then we needed to walk home not take a cab because there were like 348324024 people in the streets and nobody used cars anymore. we walked for like 5 seconds and arrived home. mom did lots of drugs, and was sad a lot on her own. THIS night she took too many drugs.(probs the ones i made her buy) and was on the couch almost lifeless. my mom had a russian boyfriend who was evil and weird. he wanted to make money off me in russia. he stopped me from following my friends and was evil. then it went into another story that ryan reynolds saw us taking off our clothes and liked us and he wanted to save us so he battled the crazy dude. he had ice and gasoline power. he turned into other things (shape-shifter) he turned into a tank and he battled, he turned into some gigantic metal octopus and they battled. finally ryan reynolds won by putting something in the exhausts and overheating him and he exploded. his human body was beside the wreckage with his old gun. ryans friend goes `What are you gonna do, shoot me? hhahah`and as they walk up a ramp into the house he gets shot and evil russian enters his body secretly. ryan reynolds gets home and sees a cockroach in the bathtub.looks up and its an old lady holding a lobster. turns into the friend with powers, then i wake up.
i had a dream last night that a polar bear ate a midget and i cried because it was my fault for letting him out in the backyard because aziz ansaris family was having a wedding and i shouldve known the polar bear would attack
